Primary Positionalitites

To the normal person, anger is seen as a detriment. It is a transitory annoyance and viewed as disruptive. The obvious antidotes are those of compassion, acceptance, love, and the willingness to forgive. 
Transcendence requires the willingness to surrender primary positionalities:

Harboring chronic resentments and milking ‘injustices’.

Unrealistic expectations of the world and relationships, including expectations of convenience, agreement, approval, compliance, and others.

Surrendering self-centeredness as a lifestyle and focusing on changing oneself instead of the world.

Willingness to surrender the residual infantile expectations (of age two) of self, others, and the perceived imperfect world, e.g. ‘God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference’ (as per the 12-step program).

Taking responsibility for bringing inner infantile attitudes to the surface and subordinating them to mature and essentially more gratifying processes, such as reason, balance, and concern for others.

Realize that resentment or anger is not about what others ‘are’, but about what they ‘are not’ (i.e., ‘not’ generous, rather than stingy; ‘not’ unselfish, but selfish; ‘not’ careful, but thoughtless, etc.)

… The processing out of anger requires inner honesty and the willingness to surrender what is not integrous and essentially unworkable and replace it with self-confidence.


… Willingness enables the surrender of short-term self-indulgence for long-term spiritual growth.

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